Dallas has few diversions other than eating, drinking and shopping.....and shopping does not interest us.
So we spend our time hopping from restaurant to restaurant and to every pub that we can find in search of the perfect meal and the perfect beer.

We randomly review restaurants and bars, dishes and beers at whim and give our brutally honest opinions of our findings. And while we concentrate on Dallas, we travel far and wide to sample cuisine from all regions of the country and beyond.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Road Trip Dining - Koffee Kup Family Restaurant

Koffee Kup Family Restaurant - Hico, Texas

There are so many cliches that can be used to describe Hico, which is located about 1.5 hours southwest of Dallas in Hamilton County.  Country?  Oh my, yes.  Dirty?  A bit dirty, yes.  Scary?  Only if you are not a white, baptist, tea party member.  But regardless of what this town is, or isn't, I must admit that we have made this trip half-way to nowhere 3 times now just to eat at what used to be the Koffee Kup Kafe (the spelling should give away to you the feel of the town).  Texas Monthly ranked one of the burgers here as the 41st best in the state of Texas and though I have not eaten at every burger joint in Texas, I believe that this burger is in the top 10 that I have had anywhere.

As you walk in the door the music stops and you feel the eyes of Texas upon you.  The patrons then decide whether or not you are harmless and hopefully put away their guns.  You see the kitchen immediately off to your right and see the first eyebrow raiser...the cooks.  Not the pimple faced kids or the hispanic staff you usually see, but older ladies, wearing aprons for goodness sake.  "Aunt Bee", you shout, "where's Andy and Opie"?  The patrons reach for their guns again...maybe they were a bit hasty to judge you as harmless.  You are sat in the back, windowless room where you cannot get away quicky if the crowd turns ugly, but you don't care, because you know you are going to have a feast. 

These burgers are a full 1/2 pound of hand formed ground beef, cooked anyway you wish, served on a homemade, yeasty, sweet, unbelievably delicious bun.  Yeah sure, you can get a plain old burger, but the other options peak your curiosity... cream cheese with jalepenos.. pepper jack cheese with guacamole and sour cream...sliced jalepenos with bacon and ranch... mother goose, which do you try?  How about the one with homemade chili?  BBQ burger?  Sauteed mushrooms with grilled onions?  Here's and idea for you, bring 3 friends, get 4 different burgers and cut them into quarters and pass them around.

But just as you feel that you are ready to make your selection you look around and see the guy at the table next to you is eating chicken fried steak, which comes with as many sides as you wish, mashed potatoes and gravy...  macaroni and cheese...  green beans... and a piece of Sweet Potato Spice Cake with cream cheese icing and pecans scattered across the top.  Oooooo. 

Take my advice and stick with the burgers.... "Pardon"?  "I said. what side with that, honey"?  Steak Cut french fries, curley fries, onion rings or fried okra?  WILL THE MADNESS NEVER END?  "Ok, I'll have the onion rings" you finally say, which I whole heartedly agree with my friend.  Hand battered, sweet, crispy onion rings.  Magnificent.

When the burger arrives you are stunned into silence by the magnitude of the feat you will soon be undertaking.  "That damn thing is a big as a hubcap", you think to yourself.  Oh yes, a delicious, juicy, messy, wonderful hubcap.  And as you pick this monster up, trying to figure out the best way to stuff it into your face you remember that you have to save room for the pie.  Luxurious, rich homemade pies as thick as your fork is long.  Which of the 13 will you have?  Oh.  My.  God.

Luckily the downtown of Hico has enough interesting shops and things to see to keep you interested for a couple of hours while you wait for the mass that you just devoured to move a bit so that you can drive home before you fall into a food coma.  So put on your best camoflage t-shirt and your buffet pants and make the drive deep in the heart of Texas and join the Allen family at their Koffee Kup Family Restaurant.

Koffee Kup Family Restaurant
300 W. 2nd St.
HWY. 281 & HWY. 6
HICO, TEXAS, 76457

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